M: What?
E: A slug Mummy, I've found a slug. On the floor. Here.
M: Really? Where? Not in the house? Not first thing in the morning? Oh Lord.
E: Yes Mummy, and look. It is definitely a leopard slug, it has spots on its back. Mummy?
M: Great.
E: It's a lovely one.
M: (Thinking: How very Gerald Durrell of you darling). Did the slug get rid of the ants?
E: No. Slugs eat greens.
M: I need a coffee. And some kitchen roll. And a camera, that's huge...
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