As for knowing what to do next and the crossroads... you of all people, my seeing white feathers blogging friend, should trust that the crossroads will have an answer themselves as and when. Wait. Something will come along. In the meantime, that book - perhaps work up your short stories. A collection.
Anyway... for me, as a child I had no doubt. I wanted to be a nanny. Think Mary Poppins/Sound of music... it was a vocational thing. I ONLY EVER WANTED to be a nanny. I trained. I qualified. I nannied. I had a happy time doing a job I loved for twenty years. And then, hit that self same crossroads myself.
I had travelled greatly as both a nanny and a bum, and had always written journals. My love for writing and travel led me to my husband and my journalism degree (not nec in that order).
The kids were never truly on the agenda, so my own white feathers blew around a bit and made me become a mummy of my own.
For now I fit in the freelance around them while they're young... it works. I realise I'm doing exactly what I want to do for every time I write anything, I am fulfilled.
"If you cannot stop writing then you were supposed to be a writer." That is a great quote from an incredible author. I just cannot remember who. And that'll be why I am not a marine biologist or a doctor!
Don't stress this crossroads, embrace it. And trust. Hope you soon catch a white feather on your way! PS Going to link this to LIFE AS IT IS now, as I feel I just wrote a post! Do hope that's okay with you?! x